Am I my Mother/Father?

First, let me just say, You are a good parent. You wouldn’t be here on this page if you weren’t. Being a parent, you may have several different types of concerns. 

First, you have your own parents. You may be processing things like: 

• Am I turning into my mother? I hear her voice in my head when I talk to my children.

• One of my parents died years ago. Why does the grief still linger so heavily?

• Why am I doing the same things my parents did that I promised myself I wouldn’t do as a parent?

• Why the heck did my parent do that to me? How can they still excuse their behavior? I would never do that to my own child!

AND then, you’re processing how you’re parenting your own child:

• Am I transferring my own pain onto them in unhealthy ways?

• Why am I so worried about my children so much of the time? I thought this was supposed to be more fun.

• My partner and I are on two totally different planets when it comes to discipline. Should I side with my child, or side with my partner? Both ways leave me with pain.

• Ugh!  I thought if I was good enough my child would never critique me! They have no idea how good they have it.

Am I a good parent?

If you’re having thoughts or questions like these, I’m here to help. I know this is just the surface of what it’s like to be a parent, and we’ll be able to work through those specific to you in session. I’m here to guide through your own story and experiences with your parents- and in life- that may have caused a great deal of harm to help you transform and heal into the parent (and person) you want to be.

Breaking the Cycle

You love your children fiercely. And sometimes, you hear your parent's voice coming out of your mouth—and you promised yourself you'd never say that.

You're doing everything "right"—reading the parenting books, trying to stay calm, working on yourself—but old patterns keep showing up. You snap at your kids the way your mom snapped at you. You withdraw when things get hard, just like your dad did.

This isn't about learning more parenting techniques. This is about understanding why these patterns exist and how to truly change them.

Here's what makes this work different:

Instead of: "My 3-year-old won't listen"
We explore: "Why does my child's defiance trigger such rage in me? What did defiance mean in my childhood?"

Instead of: "How do I get my partner on the same page?"
We explore: "Why am I so terrified of conflict with my partner? What happened when my parents disagreed?"

Instead of: "I feel like a bad parent"
We explore: "Where did I learn that my worth depends on being perfect? What would it mean to let myself be human?"

This is the long game. You're not just changing your parenting—you're changing the legacy you pass down.

Consider Joining my process group

I offer an ongoing interpersonal process group where parents work on these patterns alongside others navigating life transitions. It's deeper relational work, not a parenting skills class.

Here’s what you’ll gain from our time together:

• Understanding tools to manage your anxiety and show up fully as the parent you want to be

• Improving your dynamic with your children

• Exploring what healthy boundaries look like in all of your relationships (spouse, friends, children, your parents, and more)

• Incorporating more positive aspects of your parenting and your parent’s parenting skills that you love

• Honoring all the goodness you are bringing to other people’s lives

The past does not have to control who you are today. You deserve to grow as a parent just as your child deserves to grow. One more time- you’re a great parent. Contact me today and we’ll get started helping you become more fully you.